tnppostwoman.com archives

Simone Says: Who hasn’t seen Bridget Jones’ Diary and not become totally enthralled during the last scene in which Mr Darcy stumbles across Bridget’s opinion of him in the pages of her journal.

Julia Roberts herself claims to have a very secret diary that she would die if anyone read it as she’d be in very big trouble. Oprah converted legions of fans into journal-keeping addicts. Thousands of US soccer Mums scribbling away in their diaries instead of watching their kids at training. So over the last five years, keeping a journal has become quite fashionable.

I myself, have become addicted to journal-writing since the beginning of this year and have found that my career and weight have stabilised nicely as a result of “getting out” whatever or whoever is annoying me in writing. It also helps keep up my writing skills for these posts. Like Julia however, I’d die if anyone found it!

Studies show that keeping a journal in the correct way can have huge therapeutic benefits for women under stress.

Tell Us: Do you keep a journal? Has anyone ever found yours? Do you feel any benefits since keeping one?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

Not that long ago when we were kids, every cool kid in town kept a little journal full of daily ramblings. The little pink journals owned by girls came with little padlocks for good measure. No one was supposed to read it other than ourselves and the privileged person we termed best friend. Stored within is our joys and sorrows, ups and downs, the soy sauce from the noodle stall and the curry sauce from the prata store. I never kept a journal, why didn’t I?

In my opinion, humanity is way too comprehensive and complicated to be replicated accurately on pen and paper. No body wants to read journal entries comprising of the likes of ” I brushed my teeth and went to school…”. What goes into journals then? Naturally things we want to reminisce about in the future. Some folks see it as revenue to vent frustrations for their woes while other folks see it as a collection of celebrations and joy. ”Oh, the chocolate fudge cake was heavenly, how I wish I could eat the entire cake but I don’t want to appear like a glutton or have a cake shaped bottom!” Whether it’s filled with vengeance or secret pleasures, no, we do not want most folks to read them. We want it to be a replication of specific memories to be perused in the future.

Well, I digressed. Why don’t I keep a journal? To me , if I write anything, I want it to be read, if my journal is going to include the above mentioned items that I deem private and confidential , I wouldn’t want to potentially land myself into hot soup when someone undesirably gets hold of my journal. These events are naturally memorable as it is. Who can forget the last time our birthday cake was spiked with salt? Let alone the first kiss? These memorable events are thickly laced with every emotion imaginable to mankind; I do not think anyone needs a journal to be reminded of those days. My memory is the best journal for me.

As such, my ‘journal’ has never been discovered; good friends know bits and pieces which I revealed, that’s all. I certainly see numerous benefits in keeping my journal in my head. It does not cost a penny, take up any space, nor can it be exploited, unless I’m the victim of a highly unlikely lobotomy. I also carry them through thick and thin. Go journal! Till death do us apart!

Peng Tie Lun, 26, tutor

I still fondly remember the days whereby my teacher used to ask my class to write our daily encounters in a brown jotter book. Preaching endlessly to us how keeping a journal aids in improving our command of the English language (which is true by the way). I got hooked and progressed to the lock-and-key diary when I got older, burying my head into my precious journal of secrets as my emotions flowed out unstoppable in the torrent of ink. Then, somehow I lost the passion to write as work and family took over. It wasn’t till recently the blogging fever hit me (journal writing gone hi-tech) did I started to pick up the pen, opps! I mean type on the keyboard with a variety of fonts to choose from. Even though I had the option of locking up my entries online, I never felt they were securely left for only my eyes in the vast internet highway. Journal writing is just not the same anymore with the intrusion of technology. Nothing beats the familiar feel of pen scribbling on good old paper with my journal tucked safely under my pillow.

Seah Sye Kuim, 59, homemaker

I used to think that keeping a journal is really a waste of time. You want to write down your thoughts but you don’t want people to know? Then just keep it inside you! Also, my idea of writing journal was associated with entries written for school assignments which were often tasteless and inevitably boring daily happenings. I meant how personal can they get if teachers were going to read them!

Iceberg

Simone Says: In April of this year comedian Will Ferrell and fellow actor Adam McKay launched Funny Or Die.com, a website for their home-made comedy skits.

The site became a phenomenon, spearheaded by a video called The Landlord featuring McKay’s foul-mouthed yet cute-as-a-button two-year old daughter Pearl. Shot on a handycam during Ferrell’s son’s birthday party, the video was simply a bit of creative fun for the Saturday Night Live graduate.

The video garnered 48 million hits and drew so much attention to Ferrell’s and McKay’s other internet antics that big-name celebrities like Brooke Shields, Danny DeVito and Bill Murray took part in similar impromptu performances all for free and for the creative greater good!

However was little Pearl exploited? In the clip, Pearl admits to being an alcoholic! Take a look at The Landlord at: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/74 and tell me what you think. In my opinion it’s all in good fun but it also occurs to me that Pearl had to be taught that foul language by Ferrell and her own father McKay.

Tell Us: Do you think little Pearl was exploited in this video? Is the video in good taste or just plain funny?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

For the adults, it’s may all be in the name of good clean fun. It’s all good if Pearl knows what she’s doing.The fact is she is way too young to comprehend what’s going on and it may return to haunt her when she’s much older. Further more she has plenty of time to grow up and now’s not the time for her to learn how to spew foul language.It would seem to me that Mckay is having fun and publicity at his innocent daughter’s expanse. The public is enthusiastic about that video and the site because they get a glimpse into glamorous actors’ private lives.That alone does not justify the actors’ treatment towards little Pearl.

Peng Tie Lun, 26, tutor

Simone Says: As we close on another year it would be apt for me as Guest Postwoman,  who is chosen to write about entertainment and women’s issues, to look a woman who has come out No. 1 this year in Entertainment Weekly’s list of the top 25 Entertainers of 2007.

Starting out her career as an author with beginnings as humble as Harry Potter’s cupboard on Privet Drive, the single mother with a dream J K Rowling (in true Oprah-esque fashion) battled her way into the history books with the Harry Potter franchise. The Harry Potter empire has reeled in an estimated US$15 billion and that’s not even including the US$4.49 billion earned from the Harry Potter movies.

So as another year comes to a halt, I want to devote a little moment of wonder and awe to the woman  who “…got people to tote around her big, fat old-fashioned printed-on-paper books as if they were the hottest new entertainment devices on the planet”. Forget The Secret, J K Rowling is her own advice manifested! All I know is that Oprah must be scared she has met her match.

Tell Us: Do you think Rowling deserves to be 2007’s No. 1 entertainer? If not, Who do you think deserves the title over her?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

Rowling was recently picked as Entertainment Weekly No 1 Entertainer of the Year. Her influence among children and adults is undeniable, but does she deserve to be no.1?

‘Welcome to the world of Entertainment‘ where we ‘wish’ we can do what Harry Potter does by making things appear and happen just by the wave of his magic wand and spells in the ‘fantasy world’ but instead we are stuck with a boring office job or stressful rat race in ‘reality‘ in order to buy that dream house/car. So as this magician always tell his audience, entertainment is ‘usually’ an ‘exaggeration’ and should be taken with ‘a pinch of salt’.(Leave the ‘truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth’ to the courthouse)

As to whether Rowling deserves to be ‘No 1‘ , I will pass the verdict only after I know the voting outcome of the religious folks over the issue of the ‘gay’ professor (which I am sure I remembered correctly) in Rowling’s interview. However, I am very sure that the ‘gay’ debate this year seems to be very ‘hot’ and I will vote it as the ‘No 1 news in Singapore 2007′.

Victor Yap Boon Heng, late 30s, magician

I agree. How many people do you know have watched or read JK Rowling’s Harry Potter series? Both children and adults were held spellbound with the magical adventures of the young wizard boy, his friends and enemies.

Deviating from the all ends well and fairytale happy endings, JK’s written words challenges authority and delves into the deep dark side of human nature and all its stinky selfish manifestations. Did it waive off the charm? No, just take a look at the snaking queue of muggles (humans) who queued in advance for her official release of the latest book or the million of dollars raked in for the sure box office hit.

It’s no denying she gave birth to one of the most lucrative movie franchise ever from the creation of an original work through sheer hard work. Reading a book (a thick one) has never been more trendy. You would be living on another planet if you have not read the book or god forbid seen the movie! Who cares about the latest I-am-not-a-plastic-bag bag? Give me the old fashioned hardcover or paperback Harry Potter book please.

It is simply magical. She deserves the title. And I am looking forward to spending my money on the next Harry Potter instalment. Her detractors beware: Expecto patronum!

Sng Xing Ping, 24, copywriter

Yes, J K Rowling deserves a place on the list of top entertainers. No author has captured the imaginations of so many children all over the world as she has. Anyone who can get so many kids reading deserves to be up there on this list, especially in this age of computers and other competing distractions.

Josephine Low, 63

Simone Says: Well, I am happy to see Lindsay Lohan back in the news again.

See http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20166542,00.html  On 14 Dec, the young starlet called into a Las Vegas radio station to get some Hannah Montana tickets for her friend. I don’t know about you but I would’ve assumed that La Lohan would be able to get tickets to just about anything (well maybe not to Hilary Duff’s private slumber party) without having to call a public radio station.

So was it a well-directed publicity stunt? I think so. Lindsay ended up on the phone with the radio DJs and spilled all about her post-rehab plans which include a new album and yes, you guessed it, a humanitarian trip to Africa. She will be joining the likes of Brad, Angelina, Oprah and Madonna to go to African nations and publicise “giving back.”

So if every celebrity is bombarding Africa with their presence then how bad does that make those celebrities with no philanthropic bones in their bodies? Uhmm… like Victoria Beckham?

Tell Us: What do you think of celebrity charity work? Should they keep it to themselves if they really mean it?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

I think we like to pick on celebrities because they are easy targets. But we must be objective: the needy need help, from whoever and whatever the motives of the donors may be. It’s the results that count. How many critics are lifting a finger to help anyone?

I am sure a starving refugee would much prefer the help extended by a publicity-hungry celebrity to the contempt of a cynic who merely passes judgment on the efforts of the celebrity.

I also must point out that very rarely do we do a good deed with absolute disinterest. Most of us do it at least for the feeling of satisfaction and fulfilment it gives us: if you want to split hairs, that is already an ulterior motive.

Finally, if not for Angelina Jolie, many of us would never have heard of Sudan or Dafur, let alone know what is happening over there.

Josephine Low, 63

I think Angelina Jolie is one big hyprocrite and people are only buying into her so-called activism because of her celebrity status. We all know which part of the body men think with and Angelina is so hot, she could be an axe murderer and they would still think she’s a bloody saint.

Take for example all those kids she adopted. I think its only for publicity. Aren’t there any orphans in America or is an American adopting an American not glam enough? Equal status for her kids? How come so little publicity of her own biological child and so many footage of her adopted children? If you see other celebrity parents are so careful to protect the privacy of their children, adopted or otherwise. angelina uses them for publiciy stunts.

and the biggest joke of all was that it was her adopted son who brought the idiotic brainless brad and her togehter by his calling brad ‘dad’. Puleeze, when the kid grows up, he is going into serious theraphy for live. Any parent can tell you that if their kid says something not right, they would explain the facts to them. But no, these two brainless, attention seeking people gotta blame the kid for their lust.

Is Angelina for real? Nope, she is one screwed up attention seeking vampire.

Maria Wong

I have a confession to make: I secretly worship U2 because of Bono, for his benevolence and persistence in clearing Africa’s debt and saving the world from AIDS. It is no wonder he constantly appears across world media for his charitable deeds and was also named Time’s 2005 People of the Year. Angelina Jolie, minus her distractingly sultry looks, is one of my favourite celebrities too, for her avid adoptions and selfless contributions like profits from Shiloh’s baby photos etc, to the world’s poorest communities. Celebrity causes run the gamut, but there is only one simple reason for celebs’ existence: publicity, without which the public may not be able to relate to the less well-endowed charities, nor would you and I sit up and do something about the sufferings of the less fortunate people we have never met before. Let’s face it: you are as unlikely as I am to adopt a child for Christmas, or donate a year’s salary to MILK. Celebrities help with a little prodding and leading by example. Some may accuse them of being phoney or attention-seeking, but hey, let us all look at the bigger picture. Ultimately the needy gets the attention and more concern from the world community, while goodwill earns the celebrities positive publicity and respect— a win-win situation. Saving the world doesn’t just happen in Hollywood movies, it is ongoing in real life too.

Ariel Lee, 19, student

Simone Says: Let’s get one thing out in the open. I love Kylie Minogue.
We are the same height, we grew up in the same country and cancer has affected both of our families! 

So when I was handed a copy of her new comeback album X I was rather excited. Firstly, unlike poor Britney’s comeback effort we’ve discussed on this site earlier, Kylie has the packaging and hot photos down to a T.

Additionally, there is a free sample of her fragrance, Darling, taped to the side of the CD. So yes, I was doubly excited. I put the CD in and was amazed that Track 11 Wow was a mix of her earlier Love at First Sight and Madonna’s Holiday but because I love Kylie, I let it slide. But then it happened… I heard track 12 Nu-Di-Ty. 

First it sounded a lot like Britney’s Freakshow with the subject matter of Britney’s Get Naked and the underlying threads of Put Your Hands Up For Detroit by Fedde le Grand and then tabbed on the end for good measure was a Gwen Stefani-esque Japanese girl giggle.

I confirmed their likeness by playing both Britney and Kylie songs at the same time, one on my laptop and the other on my CD player, they were almost indistinguishable. Just for the record though, Kylie’s still my idol and it’s a fairer effort than J.Lo’s Brave and both ladies are around the same age!

Tell Us: What you think of Kylie’s new songs and what “blatant” influences can you detect? How do you feel buying a pop album which is a pastiche of other people’s pop?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

These days, unless you’re into a particular singer or genre of music, most of the contemporary popular singers not only sound alike, they look alike. To the casual observer, catching a glimpse of these singers on TV, there’s hardly a difference between Beyonce and Shakira - they wear the same clothes, same hair, do the same moves, and seem to be singing the same song over and over. The nightclub dancer look seems to be in because that’s what they all look like.

This is a contrast to when I’m in a mall and they’re playing one bland Christmas song after another; among the many dozen singers, when it’s Ella Fitzgerald, you’ll instantly recognise her. It’s the same when you’re in a shop or restaurant and above the din, you suddenly hear Sinatra or Billie Holiday from all those decades ago. What these singers had was a style that was theirs and ony theirs. Not a style that is mass produced and camouflaged by a thick layer of electronic manipulation.

Mary Chan, 44

I don’t think it’s a problem with Kylie per se. I think it’s a problem will all pop and R&B singers today. Everybody sounds like somebody else.

If you listen to most pop songs on the radio nowadays you’ll find that there is nothing very original any more. They all sound alike. Even Madonna, who is the Queen of Pop and at reinventing herself, has borrowed heavily from other influences.

As long as record labels keep pushing cookie cutter pop idols and mass marketing them, there will never be much originality left in the music industry. I’ts a sad fact of the music business.

Lisa

Simone Says: Celebrities without make up is a topic which has been brewing in my mind for awhile but came to the fore on a trip to the bank the other day.

I have never been a pretty girl and I know what I look like without my face on. In fact I used to be enthralled by the thought of getting new make up and gadgets and dying my hair, when the rest of my girlfriends were more content with being natural “all-Australian” beauties.

So when I moved to Asia and discovered the myriad of crazy eyelash extensions, whitening cream and the like, I was in heaven. That, added to the numerous shoots I was doing, meant I learned pretty quickly how to transform myself from an average little nerd into a manga-looking doll who is passable enough to work in entertainment.

But when I went to the bank the other day, the teller said to me: “Today, you look really different” because I was sans face. In fact I think she only recognised me because I was asking for some paperwork. I do not at all resemble myself without make up and I am well aware of this.

Not that I really consider myself a full-blown celebrity but it did get me thinking about the numerous “Celebs Without Make Up” features I keep seeing. Take a look at this link: http://www.dribbleglass.com/subpages/strange/celebs.htm. What do such articles reveal? What we already know - that entertainment is a medium of artifice? Or do they allow normal Jack and Jill to feel less pressured at attaining what often seems to be ridiculous levels of beauty?

Tell Us: Celebrities without make up: Let them have a day off. Or can we be judgmental since they are in the limelight?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

Simone Says: I have written about it before and I’m writing about it again because it affects me so!

Last night I was “removed” from Facebook by a “friend”. That’s right, if the social networking site was cruel enough to post a news feed about losing friends as much as it does about gaining them, mine would pathetically read “Simone Heng and Mr X are now no longer friends” or “Simone Heng has been removed from Mr X’s Friend’s list.”

Seeing as most people tend to add people to their Friends lists who are purely acquaintances, it would then mean that you would have to do something pretty awful to be erased.

I surveyed my friends over my discovery. Some said I would have had to have stolen someone’s boyfriend or dated a guy’s father to be so bad as to be erased, seeing as leaving someone you don’t particularly care for in your Friends list is actually quite unobtrusive. I can assure you I did no such bad things as those listed above!

Upon going into my inbox messages from this person, I realised they were still readable but Mr X’s photo had disappeared and their profile became inaccessible. He had become a phantom friend, there one day and gone the next! It was like those fights you have with you parents when you’re 10 saying “I am angry with you!”. Removing someone from Facebook blatantly tells someone they upset you!

I am still investigating what I did wrong but in the meantime would love to hear if you have erased or even been erased by anyone on Facebook.

Tell Us: Facebook etiquette: When is it okay to erase people from your Friends list? Or is it never okay? Has this happened to you before, or have you done it to someone?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

In the virtual world, nothing’s tangible. A friendship made online by a few clicks, a stagnant pics and quirky self crafted lines can be easily stomped, deleted and turned off without any apologies or awkward sorries. My motto will be: “If you don’t want to be my friend, it’s your lost not mine. Next!” Move on. Better friendships (and better looking ones) to come!

Cheryl Sng, 24, copywriter

Simone Says: Phone manners: Can they be a deal-breaker for dating?

I have recently come to realise that in an increasingly fast-paced world, chivalry struggles to be accommodated in the dating sphere. When you’re running for work, how do you make time to buy a girl flowers? How do you remember to open the door for a woman when you have a deadline on the brain?

So it came as quite a shock to a friend when she started dating a man with no job who still had no chivalry. After their first sexual encounter and his offer of becoming her “exclusive” partner, she was shocked to wake up the next day to no text message from him. She then texted to see if he was up yet, and indeed he was, and he said he was feeling ill.

So as a concerned “neW” girlfriend, she rang to ask if he was okay and was greeted with a bitter “Wassup?” No hello, no “thank you for a great night”. Just a bunch of selfish mumblings about his feeling sick while he carried out a conversation with his father, while she was still on the line. This was a deal-breaker, no door she could handle and sharing the bill was okay, but are speaking to her like she was a stranger was deeply hurtful which cheapened what was a fantastic night.

Tell Us: Are phone manners a dating deal-breaker? Has someone’s manner on the phone to you made you re-think your union?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS FOR E-MAIL

Phone mannerism in this situation isn’t one that can be rehearsed and perfected like table manners. To even have it, it requires both to meet a simple criteria, have chemistry. Chemistry between you and your partner shows understanding, thus the emergence of phone mannerism

We all wonder how can some couples spend more than two hours on the phone sometimes. What can they possibly talk about for the conversation to last that long? However, long talks doesn’t mean you have chemistry. Even a minute’s call to ask your partner, “How are you dear?” and a reply of “Thanks for caring” is sufficient to strengthen the bond. Phone mannerism isn’t the dating deal-breaker. It’s the lack of chemistry that makes it fail to last forever.

Danial, 17, student

Simone Says: I recently asked a few of my friends how soon is too soon to meet the parents of the person you’re dating.

A friend of mine just met a fantastic girl. He was really into her and found her very funny but after three dates she asked him to meet her parents. My friend freaked out and then began ignoring this girl completely even though he liked her a lot.

The crunch came when she went onto Facebook and saw that he had just been on there five minutes earlier, around the same time she had tried to call him, and that he was indeed ignoring her. She placed a huge notice on her status pretty much embarrassing him in front of everyone for not being honest with her.

This entire drama played out amongst our circle of friends could have been solved if my mate had just gone ahead and sat through a family function with her relatives. However, it could be argued, seeing as she was such a psycho in the end that it was a good thing that he actually got out of what possibly could’ve been a stalker situation later on.

But it does raise the question: When is it too early to meet someone’s parents and how much of a deal-breaker is meeting them too early?

Tell Us: How soon would you want to meet your other half’s parents, and vice versa? And is it a deal-breaker if you’re not ready?

You can leave a comment here or e-mail us at tnpshow@sph.com.sg Don’t forget to leave us your contact details: name, age, occupation and e-mail address or telephone number.

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LETTERS VIA E-MAIL

I think there is no definate answer to how soon one should meet their other half’s parents. It all depends on whether you partner is, for the lack of a better description, ’some you would want to bring home to your parents’. It also depends on how open your parents are to accept that their child has found someone. Coming from an open minded family, I never had problems bringing anyone home. Every situation I’ve faced have been very casual. No different from a friend coming over to hang out.

On my part, I usually have no problems with meeting my girlfriends parents, if the situation is casual. I have yet to be in a spot where the meeting is formal. If I am faced with something like that, then it might be a little awkward.

Could Simone’s friend have freaked out not because he had to meet the parents, but because the girl was stalking him on Facebook?

Keith Tan, 27